Want a cake?

Cakes are available for NYC and neighboring cities for pick up from 30 Vandam, NY, NY 10013, between 11 am and 8 pm. Pick up guide here.

All cake bases are made with olive oil, house-made Madagascar Vanilla bean extract and cage free eggs. All cakes are iced with whole Madagascar vanilla bean buttercream as a base. We use high quality ingredients and our cakes are juicy and delicious. We pipe in a whimsical sexy grandma style, not an uptight nerd style.

Cakes can be ordered up to 30 days in advance, we are unable to accept orders beyond this time frame. Wedding/large format cakes are an exception to this policy- please specify if this applies to you.

We make cakes that are 8 inch, 10 inch or 12 inch in diameter. And as a standard, they are two layers. Rectangular sheet cakes made upon request.

We do not write on cakes, DO NOT ASK. Yes, we can do it, but we are bad at it and it will be ugly and you will be disappointed and it will be expensive.

Printed Edible Images are $25.

We love your suggestions on flavor, colors and a vibe, but will use our discretion to design a cake we’re proud to serve. Include your design request in the cake submission form, if you’d like them to be considered. If they are made in follow up emails, it is too difficult to keep track of and cannot be guaranteed. Chocolate iced cakes are chocolate colored.

SIZING AND SERVINGS-

8 inch two layers feeds 28-24 ($200)

10 inch two layers feeds 30-40 ($300)

12 inch two layers feeds 50-60 ($450)

For larger parties, we can tier any of the above sizes, or do a sheet cake.

Gluten Free Available for $20, Vanilla GF cake base only.

Loser’s Classic Flavors:
Potato Chip (Vanilla Based, Chocolate Frosting, Ruffle Potato Chip Filled)

Vanilla Bean Cake with Vanilla Bean or Chocolate Buttercream).

Chocolate Cake or vanilla base with Chocolate Buttercream.

Espresso Martini (Chocolate Cake Based, Espresso Frosting)

Brown Sugar and Toasted Coconut (Vanilla Cake Based, Coconut frosting)

Strawberry Vanilla bean, whipped strawberry buttercream, vanilla cake.

Ordering outside of these flavors, will result in additional costs and will only be considered for large format cakes.

PICK UP GUIDE HERE!

A pink layered cake with whipped frosting, cherries on top, and decorated with piped cream rosettes, placed on a wire rack inside a refrigerator.
A three-tiered white wedding cake decorated with whipped cream, red cherries, and small gold edible beads, placed in a cardboard box.
Two round decorated cakes on gold and black bases, one chocolate with white icing and the other pink with white icing, placed on a white wooden surface.
Two chocolate frosted cakes with red cherries on top, one larger and one smaller, placed on gold cake boards on a metal surface.
Martha Steward holding a decorated birthday cake and smiling, with a man sitting in the background.
Green birthday cake decorated with piped frosting, pink edible decorations, and hazelnuts, placed on a gold-colored base.
A layered cake decorated with orange slices, pistachios, and orange-flavored frosting, with a ruffled pattern on the edges, inside a metal refrigerator.
Colorful decorated cake with green and yellow icing and candles, and separate chocolate cake behind it in a refrigerated display case.
A colorful, multi-layered cake decorated with purple, pink, white, and blue frosting, topped with fig slices and pistachios, sitting on a gold-colored cake board in front of framed artwork on a wall.
A round cake decorated with pink icing in a spiral pattern, topped with a cherry, on a green floral tablecloth with toy figurines around it.
A decorated cake with coffee bean accents and beige cream piped in ruffles all around.
A two-tiered birthday cake decorated with white and brown icing, topped with a gingerbread cookie shaped like a person with facial features, red buttons, and brown icing hair and limbs.
A large round cake decorated with green, black, yellow, and white icing, designed to resemble the Jamaican flag, sitting on a pink cake board in a kitchen. Surrounding it are cake tools and bowls.
Pink heart-shaped cake with purple icing decoration and writing 'THICCC' on top, placed on a black cake board at a decorated table with candles and floral arrangements.
Decorative candles with white icing and gold accents on a white surface, against a white wall.
A refrigerated display case with a large layered cake on a gold base and multiple smaller cakes decorated with cream and cherries.
Pink and white frosted round cake with cherry on top, decorated with pink swirls and white pearls.
Several individual cream pies topped with cherries on a metal rack.